I’ve spent a lot of time in long check-out lines. The only thing to do is to scan the magazine headlines. But since one must stand quietly waiting for one’s turn, one can’t exactly express the thoughts one has when reading the latest gossip. And since I have a tendency to indulge in shallow thoughts, here are my offerings for you.
1. So Brad and Angelina are getting married. Somehow that doesn’t seem like big news. I mean after how many kids, they are finally making it official? Because they think it will stick?? And I am the only one that worries about Angelina having more babies? She admitting to not bonding as much with her natural children because they didn’t need her as much as the adopted children.
2. What woman really finds Marc Anthony attractive? I mean, we all wondered when J-lo married him, but I think she just wanted to get married and he was the best offer she’d had. He kind of looks like a very freaky vampire–and not the Twilight dreamy Edward kind but more like something from Mel Brook’s Dracula. He looks like a very dead man with a very bad post-mortem makeup job.
3. So Jennifer Anniston has more to say about Brad and Angelina. I’m tired of her complaining about the relationship. We all felt sorry for her. But now she just sounds whiny.
4. Does anyone else feel exhausted by the all the optimistic New Year’s resolutions that magazines push you to make? It wears me out and we haven’t even celebrated the new year yet.
5. I saw this sign at the mall advertising the Christmas memory of the year: pet photos with Santa. Because nothing really says Christmas like your pooc licking Santa’s jolly red cheeks. Okay, so I made that part up. But isn’t Santa for kids? Pets don’t even know or care who Santa is. Although I like the joke factor if you think of kids bringing in goldfish, frogs, lizards or tarantulas posing with Santa. Now that is a Christmas memory to cherish.
May your day be lovely and the lines be short. Share your gossip magazine musings with me. I would love to dish with you!
As a mother of twins “just like Angelina” I can only wish for the kind of help she gets with her children. I feel lucky if I shower more than once a week and somehow I don’t think she’s in the same situation. Carrying and birthing the babies isn’t the hard part-it’s what comes the next many months! But if you don’t have to do any of it yourself, except possibly play dress up or pose for pictures why not have a million! Ok, so I’m possibly a tiny bit jealous that she has constant help and lots of it, but I wouldn’t trade my life for hers! I’m a bit confused by why her biological children don’t need her as much?!? Mine NEED me plenty! But other then the Brangelina headline the only other magazine i’ve perused latedly is “Elegant Bride” so unlike my wedding. I’ve decided magazines are fantasy!
LOL!!! That is all I can say, thanks for the great laugh and for articulating what we all think about all of that silly stuff.
Okay, I am in 100% agreement with you on all that you said. I find it fascinating how the news media now seems so focused on gossip about celebrities and how prominent figures turn into celebrities with all the gossip about them. It’s a sad commentary on how the public focuses on entirely the wrong things (like who really cares about what Jennifer Aniston says about Brad and Angelina and who really cares about Brad and Angelina’s decision to get married? I certainly don’t–it doesn’t affect my life in the slightest). Anyway, I’m glad someone else shares my opinion.
OK I’m reading back… This stuff is hysterical and fun and great to peruse. My comment is: Have you noticed that Owen Wilson looks like he has genitals on his face?